I decided to join the army
until I realized that I am
- unable to do a single pushup
- medically ineligible to serve
- scared shitless of everything and have been known to scream at the sight of a spider or frightening shadow (please don’t judge; both of those things can be fucking beastly)
- a pacifist. kind of a problem.
note to self: stop watching those recruitment videos on youtube. (I think it all started through a long series of related videos from shots. sorry, wrong kind.)
have yet to listen to that song.
ill go do that now.
then ill install a hot tub on top of st peters basilica.
